Okay, I’ve got a really bad mouth ulcer. And what’s the worst thing you can do when you’ve got a really bad mouth ulcer? Eat McDonalds. (Actually, that’s the worst thing you can do without a mouth ulcer, but that’s beside the point). You never really realise just how much those fries are caked in salt until you eat with an ulcer.
McDonalds is one of those foods that suffers from the ‘Pizza Hut Never-Again’ syndrome. Ie, every time you go to Pizza Hut, you say ‘never again’ as you leave, but you always end up coming back. (Previously known as the ‘Sizzler Never-Again’ syndrome).
The photocopy guy at my work was all dressed up yesterday in a suit and tie. Normally he just turns up for work in baggy daggy tracksuits, but today he was looking real spiffy. As a joke, I asked him ‘Did someone die?’. He looked at me stone faced and said ‘yes’. (He was attending a funeral later that day). I shared my story with some other people at work and apparently I wasn’t the only one who put their foot in their mouth:
* Ms Superiority (resident bitch at work) said in front of Photocopying Man that ‘her fiance came home with a new #2 shaved head haircut, and I almost died’.
* I also mentioned to Photocopying Man if I had to work any extra late nights it would kill me.
* One of the reception girls said in front of Photocopying Man that they could die if they got any more work.
* In front of Photocopying Man, Miss Naiveity claimed if any more students rang her up to question their results, she would personally ‘machine gun them down in a slaughterous bloodbath’.