From the monthly archives:

January 2000

Eighties Boy

January 28, 2000

Once again, the power got cut off in Torquay this evening for around two hours. I was tempted to drive down to the supermarket to see if there would be another riot (see January 16th entry) because I was so deprived of entertainment, but I controlled the urges. The company that handles electricity in the [...]

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The Good News: Medicare Now Covers Anagrams

January 27, 2000

I went and got my haircut yesterday at this place my mum usually goes to. As soon as I walked in the joint I knew I was in for a rough time. See, I don’t even pretend to understand things like ‘layering’ and associated hairdressery words. All I want is to go in there, get [...]

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Oui! Oui, L’coh, Oui!

January 25, 2000

Today I got a phone call from a consumer survey group who I’ve signed up with. I normally hate people ringing me up for surveys, but sometimes these people call me into their offices to do surveys – and I get paid $40 for each survey so I think that’s pretty fair. So far I’ve [...]

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Welcome to Tasmania: We’re the Small Intestine of Australia

January 23, 2000

I went into Geelong today and noticed in one of the shopping centres, a display that has been set up by Barwon Water, who supply the Geelong area with water. They do a pretty bodgy job at the best of times – last week in Lorne, a coastal town about 30 minutes along the coast [...]

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Oh My God, They Kilkenny

January 22, 2000

Has anyone noticed the influx of strange Maggi 2 Minute Noodles flavours? I have to say, I never thought something like tomato flavoured 2 minute noodles could even exist. I don’t know how my old man can bear to eat them, especially the tomato flavour. Once you add the tomato flavouring the noodles turn bright [...]

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Warning: Today’s Entry Contains Larry Emdur

January 21, 2000

Well, today at work we all got shuffled around into different departments and we all have to move to different cubicles. The good news is, I’m still sitting next to Ms. J, and the even better news is that on my other side is a woman I’m going to call ‘The Rock’. The Rock is [...]

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I’ll Polish You to the Death, Sheriff!

January 20, 2000

Ah, the Herald Sun is such a quality newspaper. Yesterday it reflected it’s true journalistic integrity with a headline screaming ‘Sex Blitz!’. To give you an idea of what sort of newspaper this is, yesterday they placed a story titled ‘Women reveal what they want in romance’ 15 pages before their coverage on the latest [...]

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Is That on your Cheque, Savings or Burp ‘n Fart Account?

January 18, 2000

Not long until I fly up to Sydney for a weekend. I’m really exited. I’m aiming to steal more than $15 worth of stuff from the Qantas plane I’m flying up on (this was a record set by a friend of mine). Has anyone ever taken more than $15 of stuff from a plane? Let [...]

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Mwaaaaagh!

January 17, 2000

Every morning at approximately 6.15am in this house I hear this noise coming from my shower… “Mwaaaaaaaaaaaagh!” Every morning I’m woken up by Mwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh. I knew it was of human origin but it was quite a challenge coming to some sort of conclusion as to which orifice it originated from. This morning when I heard [...]

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The Only Way is Illiteracy

January 16, 2000

I’m very excited – I found out last night that my favourite band Filter is playing a Melbourne gig in mid February. This is the first time I’ve seen them, and a rare chance too as they’re from the US. I can’t wait! ***** I was downloading some new fonts last night, and I’ve noticed [...]

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