Has anyone noticed the influx of strange Maggi 2 Minute Noodles flavours? I have to say, I never thought something like tomato flavoured 2 minute noodles could even exist. I don’t know how my old man can bear to eat them, especially the tomato flavour. Once you add the tomato flavouring the noodles turn bright red. It looks like you’re eating entrails or something.
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Jeb Official Bad Things: Stupidly Themed Food Outlets With Novelty Food Names
There’s a food outlet in Geelong called Big Bopper which makes pretty decent hamburgers, but the hamburgers have got ridiculous names. I’d prefer to ask for a “cheeseburger”, not a “Super Cheesy Bopper Burger”. The dumbest hamburger name on the menu is the “Super Greasy Bopper Burger”. What’s worse, if you only ask for a “cheeseburger”, they correct you:
Me: I’ll have a cheeseburger, thanks.
Big Bopper denizen: A cheeseburger?
Me: Yes. Thanks.
Big Bopper denizen: Do you mean… a Super Cheesy Bopper Burger?
Me: Oh, for Christ’s sake. Yes.
Big Bopper denizen: Okay, will there be any drinks with that?
Me: No. Just give me your fucking teeny bopper cheesy super happy burger thing already.
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Got an interesting email from David today…
Looking forward to “exploding myths about country bumpkin cousins”, although anyone who lives in Torquay talking about “country bumpkins” really is the pot calling the kettle peuce …
Oh really? Hehe. Well, my country cousins are from Albury/Wodonga, so what’s more bumpkinish – Albury/Wodonga or Geelong? David also advised me of two more stupid town names in Australia:
Rooty Hill, NSW 2766 (actually a suburb of Sydilly, has it’s own RSL club); and Kilkenny, SA 5009 (predates South Park by many many years… was it an… omen??)
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The other day on my lunch break…
Me: (sneezes twice)
Ant: Bless you.
Me: (sneeze two more times)
Ant: Four sneezes, that’s an orgasm.
Me: That makes no sense, you know.
Ant: Yes it does. Four sneezes is the equivalent of an orgasm.
Me: Um, do you know what an orgasm is?
Ant: Of course I do. Probably more so than you.
Me: Well, you must have a really weird sex life if your orgasms feel like sneezes.