Archive for September, 2002

A Guide on Getting Anyone You Ever Wanted Into Bed With You

September 22, 2002

Are you joking? If I knew this, I sure as fuck wouldn't be sitting here typing up crap for this site all the time!

Posted in: Self-Referential Wank | Be the first to comment on this entry »

Crisis Service Provider

September 12, 2002

It's not every day you're standing patiently at the traffic lights, idly performing your anal clench exercises when an elderly lady pulls a Jason Donovan and spontaneously falls to the ground. I don't mean a simple fall to the ground. I mean full-on, stay stiff as a plank and fall in ...

Posted in: Injuries | Be the first to comment on this entry »

Banjo Hair

September 4, 2002

'What'll it be,' sighs the beleaguered hairdresser with the enthusiasm of someone naked in a bathtub, filled to the brim with sulfuric acid. 'Spikes, please,' I politely reply, and engage in that awful hairdressing predicament where you're forced to confront your own realities of ugly disfigurement, and stare yourself in the ...

Posted in: Anger, Haircuts | Be the first to comment on this entry »

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