So I’ve successfully managed my first day back at work without plunging back into the world of liquor. Even after someone belatedly pushed a Secret Santa present my way – a bottle of wine. Luckily, wine is not something I’ve ever craved or been particularly fond of, so it’s just sitting on display in the kitchen for now, cementing my faggotry. (No doubt it’s the wine equivalent of Melbourne Bitter).
But lo, I no longer rise my spirits with… spirits. This week, anyway. I’ve desperately latched onto a new form of deadly beverage: plunger coffee.
Okay, okay, it probably makes me a massive homo. But I was humbly introduced to the ways of the plunger in Melbourne last year by two (homo, needless to say) mates of mine.
What can I say? Just as drinking Malibu is to taste the sweet, festive, edible form of coconut oil; supping greedily at a mug of plunger brew is to ingest the ozone-tinged fumes of a CityRail Tangara train carriage in molten hot liquid form. I’m hooked. Seriously, I’m almost crying every morning watching the fucker painfully brew everything so slowly but beautifully.
Daresay if I’m not back on the booze next week, I’ll probably have a drip hooked up from my plunger to my bellybutton.
Meanwhile, don’t fall for all those hokey, mysterious billboards and (groan) pavement graffiti for that odd Zero Movement website. A quick glance at the site’s registration details reveals it’s been registered by Coca-Cola. Are you really surprised? Someone with a bad ponytail was probably screaming out random buzzwords like “BLOG!”, “MYSPACE!”, and “HAPPYSLAP!” to an advertising agency. And here I was at first, thinking the site was Hillsong’s first eerie steps into the waters of guerilla marketing. Yeah, Coke Zero’s coming. Whatever.
Speaking of guerilla marketing, how are you supposed to keep a straight face when your boss is wildly struggling to find the right term to describe this form of marketing, struggling with the term on the tip of his tongue… only to announce loudly that he thinks the business should get into some “terrorist marketing”?