From the monthly archives:

August 2009

Post-Op… No, Not THAT Kind of Post-Op

August 27, 2009

My face currently resembles what would happen if Jeannie Little went completely over the edge, and began wildly swiping her own blood on her face as makeup. Yessir, I’m back from the hospital after my nose operation. Before the operation, I’d over-ambitiously planned all sorts of books to read, housework to tidy up, basically make [...]

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When Kiteboarders Fail – and Other Great Free, Cruel Forms of Entertainment

August 24, 2009

Free entertainment in your suburb isn’t a particularly vexing task. There’s a few fail-safe spectacles around my suburb which never fail to amuse… Watching angry customers teeter on the edge of sanity, as they wait for service at notoriously slow local cafes When you’re a local, you grow to learn which cafes are unbearably slow. [...]

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Another Example of Why I’m the Worst Gamer Ever

August 20, 2009

Via an instant messenger conversation today… Charm:have you played Gunpey? Me: no.. Charm: its on ds. Charm: so addictive! Me: Ahhh. I don’t have a DS anymore :-) Me: How does it work? Charm: its lines and triangles that need to be lined up to make a line across the screen. Me: SOLD

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Five Reasons Why I Won’t be Renewing my Xbox Live Subscription

August 18, 2009

My taste in videogames is possibly the worst you’ve ever come across. My enthusiasm wanes if a game doesn’t involve matching three coloured gems, desk-gnawingly pointless trivia contests or repetitive actions set to music (let me tell you about my embarrassingly laser-precise Dance Dance Revolution skills some time). Console games are something I’ve only ever [...]

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Why I Won’t Be Visiting Costco Any Time Soon

August 17, 2009

Costco opened for business in Melbourne today, like a lumbering elephant galloping into the world of Aussie retail. As far as I can tell, the store chain has melded together a supermarket, K-Mart, jewellery store and undertakers (seriously – they sell coffins) then injected everything with steroids. It sounds impossible to buy anything in a [...]

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Can’t Come to Work, I’m on Beard Leave

August 13, 2009

My goatee is something I’m rather fond of. Unfortunately, accidental facial hair makeovers are common in my life. It could be my blindness in one eye, but whenever I step in front of the mirror, it seems I get a little overzealous when tidying up my whiskers. Usually, I misjudge my shaving and become convinced [...]

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Top 10 Worst Victorian Town Names

August 6, 2009

Australia’s well known for having frequently bizarre town names. A mate of mine recently pointed out the town he grew up in on a state map of Victoria, and after taking a closer look, it boggled me. Every surrounding burb sounded like a World of Warcraft level, a Shakespearean insult, or a poo joke inflicted [...]

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