Here’s an example of how staff in a music store should help you:
You: Hey there, I’m looking for the latest totally rad Bon Jovi box set.
Staff member: Why certainly! Are you after the Japanese 8-album box set, the official “100,000,000 Bon Jovi Fans Can’t Be Wrong” set, or the unofficial compilation box of interviews and rarities?
You: Does it look like I sewed this back patch into my denim jacket for nothing? ALL THREE, YOU FOOL!
Staff member: Right away, sir! Excellent choice, sir! Let me package it all up for you immediately.
Aaaand here’s usually what happens when you visit JB Hi-Fi:
You: Hey there, I’m looking for the la–
Staff member: (immediately turns their back to you and begins muttering into a telephone at a speed which causes time to grind to a complete stop)
You: Um, excuse me? I’m looking for…
Staff member: Unnnnnnnnnnnggggghhhh? What.
You: Do you have the latest totally rad Bon Jovi box set?
Staff member: Unnnnngh, grrmmbmlb, have you heard The XX or La Roux? Geez, you’re missing out. They were great last week at Roxanne Parlour.
You: Um…
Staff member: (pulls absently at ill-fitting ironic Motley Crue t-shirt) So what was it you were after? Phoenix, did you say? (performs fatality sneer)
I’ve no idea how JB Hi-Fi performs its recruitment drive, but they seem to have almost supernatural abilities to attract the most half-awake, stoned, disinterested and vacant dolts as staff in their music section. As far as I can gather, the key selection criteria for working at JB Hi-Fi’s music department are:
- Maintain obnoxiously constructed birds-nest hair do containing no less than two hair dye colours
- Inability to express emotions unless you’re purchasing a CD from a band which Pitchfork.com wants to anally penetrate
- Processing EFTPOS transactions with enough painful tardiness to actually incite menopause while you’re waiting
- Completely dissipating if they’re required to get something from “out the back of the store”
Granted, there are some good eggs at JB, but most of them seem to be jaw-breaking tossbags in the music department. How do they do it?
{ 16 comments… read them below or add one }
Trendy, disinterested teenagers more often than not, I have to agree.
*cough* I really wish you wouldn’t speak of my employeesthat way lol.
I do agree sone stores have staff that are put quite simply. Fucking retarded. In parts (mostly Vic) it’s a culture problem, staff who have been around since the old days yet haven’t evolved with the rest of us.
In not defending them, even I know get frustrated with staff in our stores. Some of us. Like me, love music, and love reading about it, talking about it, and listening to anything we can get our hands on. It’s our job. Our life I love my job, I couldn’t do what I do at another employer, and I wouldn’t want to. Sone people only worth there because “it’s cool” to work there. We try to filter them out pretty quickly.
There are absolutely some good people there! The stores in Melbourne’s CBD in particular just seem terrible.
Prahran. Surly and disinterested. Not the ones in the electronics area, but the ones behind the counter who take the money. I wouldn’t dare ask for assistance.
Like the douches who work in (many) guitar stores. But with less musical talent.
Whoaski… you aint talking about no Empire Records here… JB is to music stores what McDonald’s is to haute cuisine, remember.
My suggestion would be to find one of those dark, dingy music stores that makes you a little bit scared to enter. One where the staff wear Motley Crue t-shirts because they know who they are, not because of the ice-cold irony.
Failing that, jump online… none of this download malarkey though, actual physical CDs purchased from online vendors – that’s the best way to get the Japanese 8-album box set if you ask me.
Music Staff: Fuckwittis Emeritus.
Video Games Staff: fuckin’ TOP NOTCH at the Bourke Street store:
Boxing Day, 3pm, CBD:
Me: “Got any Wii’s left?”
Dude: “Yep. Do you want the bundle too?”
Me: “Nope, just the console and these games.”
Dude: “Sweet. Follow me, I’ll put you through the counter right now.”
I was in and out within 15 minutes. I still relish the dirty looks from the 30-odd people I was placed in front of.
I’ve also had excellent service from the Computers and Electronics staff at Prahran.
I shop at JB quite a lot because it’s the best place to get reasonably priced cds of the more ‘mainstream’ variety. The staff at the new South Wharf store seem pretty good…
Also, you know we share an interest in Metal, but I have to confess that I love The xx album *blush* but I wouldn’t piss on La Roux if she was on fire.
its not isolated to the victorian stores! my local in outer suburban WA is just as awful! I think the guy that ‘helped’ me when i asked for the new Joanna Newsom cd nearly cried when he realised he’d have to go out the back and check if it had arrived… that is once his heart started beating again from the shock of having to know something about music that isnt played on nova!
@themutant – got any idea where to find one of those music stores anywhere outside of an east coast CBD?? where i live, i consider myself lucky to even have a JB since there are no alternatives.
Yeah they should all wear capes that would make the much cooler.
Dont you think jeb?
Canberra too. Although even the monosyllabic grunts of the Pattinson haired crowd at JB Hi-Fi can’t compare with the staff at a Sanity store. No wonder they’re mostly shutting down. I asked for the new B-52′s album at one a year ago, and the douche behind the counter literally responded with “the WHAT?” – he had no idea what I was talking about. Idiots.
How do they do it? Paying them next to nothing, especially on Saturdays, that’s how they do it. But serves them right for asking for Bon Jovi anyway LOL! But seriously the counter staff are a breed unto themselves in most stores. Don’t know much about anything. Duhh B52′s? Jb’s like all Lady Gaga and shite now. But what’s the alternative. inSanity?
After receiving consistently terrible customer service at the Adelaide city JB Hi Fi store (and twice at West Lakes), I typed ‘why are jb hi fi staff such c**ts?’ into my old pal Google & here we are. I work in customer service. I do not expect anyone to kiss my arse ever. I’m also very aware of treating customer service staff with respect (or, the same as I treat every other human being). And (rough estimate..) 80% of the JB staff I’ve had the misfortune to encounter have been rude, arrogant, opinionated, sullen & unpleasant. What’s the criteria for being hired? Facial piercings, skinny jeans, pseudo-posh Australian private school accent, totally individual tribal tattoos that everyone else has & a toxic attitude towards anyone not exactly matching the aforementioned? One of the best things about leaving school was not having to spend any time with the likes of the be-fringed & bitter JB kids ever again.
Great comments Commandra!
I found the Adelaide staff to be the same. I loathe them! There is one short arse bogan douche bag in particular who works in the headphones section. I think he may be on smack? I hope he is for his sake. At least then there is the chance he might quit. Or grow up. I drop into JB only because it’s cheap & convenient but I really try to avoid the place. It’s a pity because there are a couple of capable staff there. There’s one blond chick with the obligatory piercings and asymmetrical tattoos who is lighting fast on the till and pretty cool. Most are throwbacks though who are probably getting what they deserve in life.
Poor JBHiFi, another business affected by the Hipster epidemic running rampant in our cities these days. God I just wanna slap those stupid glasses off their contemptable faces. If you want geniune service find the guy/girl that looks like a muso/band manager/roadie (usually stocking the metal section to be away from the hipsters)..every store has one. They will help you even if your looking for an Andre Reiu cd. :-)
Poor JBHiFi, another business affected by the Hipster epidemic running rampant in our society these days. God I just wanna slap those stupid looking Nana Mouskouri glasses off their contemptable faces. If you want geniune service find the guy/girl that looks like a muso/band manager/roadie (usually stocking the metal section to be away from the hipsters)..every store has one. They will help you even if your looking for an Andre Reiu cd. :-)