From the category archives:

Celebrities, TV and the media

Top 9 Lessons Learnt from Australia’s Terrible TV Game Shows of the Past

May 27, 2009

There are many lessons to be learnt from our nation’s blunderings through TV game shows. For every Sale of the Century and It’s a Knockout, there’s still fecal dregs like Keynotes and The Up Late Game Show With Hotdogs lurking under the televisual toilet bowl rim. So, onwards! Let our future game show concepts learn [...]

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If You’re a Journalist Suffering ADHD, I’ve Got a Magazine Who Wants to Employ You

May 25, 2009

For many years now, I’ve subscribed to Kerrang! magazine. If you’re unfamiliar with the subject matter, it was recently described as “the metal equivalent of a teenage gossip magazine” by the host of my favourite music podcast. He’s bang on the money. There’s been a few things that’ve started bugging me about the magazine in [...]

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How to Confuse Drunk Viewers of Sports TV into Gambling Their Money Away

May 19, 2009

After a recent poker night in which I inexplicably did pretty well, I’ve been watching a little televised poker. As far as I can tell, One HD doesn’t have much else to broadcast yet, besides foreign cricket matches and Slamball. What particularly struck me on this show was seeing an advertisement for a new poker [...]

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Australia’s Next Top Lesbian, Mortal Kleaning, and Other Unrealised Game Ideas

May 14, 2009

What ho! This past week I’ve had a visiting interstate friend to entertain. My buddy was a fine house guest, and even spent the better part of 30 minutes running after a rogue mouse we’ve been trying to entrap for weeks. Any boarder who arrives with rodent eradication skills is welcome in Chez Jeb! Any [...]

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Logie Awards 2009 Live Blog

May 3, 2009

While a rotten cold has struck me down, self-medicating myself with Codral and bourbon seems like the ultimate combination for live blogging the Logie Awards this evening. For those international folk unfamiliar with the Logie: it’s not a disease, nor a skateboarding trick. It’s an Australian TV award which has a shockingly similar appearance to [...]

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Big Bother

April 22, 2009

Reading about the recent shenanigans of Big Brother’s Mike Goldman has got me thinking about an old job I used to have. Many, many years ago I was a “talent” manager for the evicted housemates on Big Brother. On paper, that was supposed to involve high-profile endorsement deals and media appearances; but usually consisted of [...]

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Media Watch: The Video Game

April 14, 2009

My love of Media Watch seems to border on the sexual. The vitriol, the hypocrisy, the ongoing battles against familiar targets… it seems to be the stuff of video games. In fact, I’d gladly buy a Media Watch Fighter II video game! Just think about the possible characters in the game… Playable Characters: Jonathan Holmes [...]

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Undertele: A Tale of Two Trujillos

March 19, 2009

What would happen if Rob Trujillo (bassist for Metallica) and Sol Trujillo (head honcho at telemegaglobocorp Telstra) were brothers and forced to live together? A HILARIOUS SITCOM, THAT’S WHAT. UNDERTELE: A TALE OF TWO TRUJILLOS (credits roll) ROB TRUJILLO: (knocks on door) Sol, I’m home! SOL TRUJILLO: (opens door) Why are you here! Leave me [...]

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I Telecommanded Your Mum

February 19, 2009

Everyone’s got those lovey-dovey couples’ nicknames for each other… honeypie. Sweetie. Erotically charged buttock-boil. (Okay, maybe we’re not all married to Dani Filth). What I truly relish is those nicknames ascending into highly abusive condemnations, which somehow still remain endearing. Yelling “NOOB!” at each other over the last few years has somehow organically blossomed into [...]

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The Truth About Xavier Rudd

February 11, 2009

It’s interesting to see how Xavier Rudd has grown in popularity over the years. Deliriously independent, socially conscious, so goddamn acoustic he makes Jack Johnson seem like Kerry King by comparison; everyone certainly seems to have warmed to him and his ways. All of which is utterly alien to me, because XAVIER RUDD USED TO [...]

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