From the category archives:

Food, drink and booze

Bull Pizzle against Prolapse

March 1, 2010
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It was one of those conversations that could only happen after too much beer. We’d been discussing a mate of mine’s rather frightening obsession with cooking his own home-made jerky. If you’re going to the trouble of purchasing specific cuts of meat to shrivel it down into a lifeless husk – surely you’re less than [...]

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The Martini Clause

January 28, 2010
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Earlier this month, I briefly flew up to Sydney to catch up with some mates. While catching one of Sydney’s trains, I spotted a familiar “no alcohol” sign. Here’s my conundrum: the standard “no alcohol” sign features a martini glass. Despite this, most “no alcohol” locations like public transport are where you’re least likely to [...]

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Top 5 Things I Can Do Now I’m Single

January 18, 2010
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Well, howdy there. I’ve settled into my new place, and have plenty of recent events to write about in the coming weeks: berko neighbours, household disasters, and a New Year’s Eve skinnydipping jellyfish sting disaster among others. Hopefully this is the start of almost-daily blog updates again. There were certain activities which really seemed to [...]

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Spice Me Up

April 7, 2009

Just like Grant Bowler’s pectoral muscles, my palate is getting spicier as time goes by (seriously, have you seen him in Outrageous Fortune? This is not the weedy guy who hosted The Mole any more!) You couldn’t get anyone more adverse to hot, spicy food than me a few years ago. Then I accidentally consumed [...]

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Marketers, The Dictionary is not your Random Flavour Generator

March 4, 2009

There’s an increasing marketing habit I’ve observed with food advertising in recent times, and I have something to say. Corporations, take note: places are not flavours. For example, what the hell am I supposed to assume “southwest sauce” is before Subway slop it all over my miserable, wrinkled sandwich? The gritty, earthy taste of Arizonian [...]

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Hall of Helmets

January 25, 2009

Unlike the careers of anyone who appeared in Scandal’us, I’m not dead! We were in the process of moving house, so I was sans internet for a while. Adam organised the removals process while I was at work this week, so he began unpacking and orchestrating a redefinition of what can reasonably be hung on [...]

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Nandon’t

December 14, 2008

Everyone’s got an awesome local takeaway food shop in their area. Here in Port Melbourne, it’s the awesome chicken shop we have nearby. The two blokes who run this joint are champs. You get discounts if you’re a local, a guaranteed laugh, free food if your order is taking a little while to prepare, and [...]

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Lite and Easy to Shame

December 1, 2008

This will no doubt see me suffering some mockery in comments, but Adam and I started Lite & Easy the other week. We’ve done it before, and it helped us lose the weight we wanted pretty quickly. Yes, it’s a little bit lazy; and yes, the food isn’t exactly gourmet (although it’s not that bad) [...]

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There’s Always One Satanic Bad Egg

November 24, 2008

It’s with great trepidation that I write any blog entry revolving around the word “egg”. Inevitably, Adam will peer over my shoulder and then we’ll be egg-converting words all evening to, frankly, what results in very little hilarity. It’s an egg-scruitating egg-sercise in seeing who can egg-ceed the other’s ability to egg up the most [...]

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Thai-ny Food Delivery

November 12, 2008

There’s a new Thai restaurant which has opened near our place, and although their food is mighty delicious, it arrives with an ethical dilemma of sorts. Whenever Adam and I place an order with them via phone, I hear something like: “Thank you, the order will be there in 15 minutes START COOKING YOU LITTLE [...]

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