From the category archives:

Really old posts

Things I’ll Only Admit When I’m Updating This Website Drunk, #1

February 4, 2005

Welcome to part one of an ongoing series which threatens to eclipse the otherwise sober scribings on this site! Excuse any keyboard slurrings any advance. Tonight’s guilty admission: there’s a homeless guy who hangs around near our place, whom I find inexplicably attractive. This isn’t the first occurance of such vagrant lust, either. There used [...]

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Niplash

February 3, 2005

My hair is now officially receding. This will likely set forth some terrifying chain of events in my life, starting with Soundgarden being added to the “classic hits” FM stations as of tomorrow. Although, granted, I’ve had a bit of problem with hair from the word go. I’ve never been able to grow hair on [...]

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There’s a Neon Ballroom Coming Up my Throat

January 31, 2005

Daniel Johns is suddenly buff and it’s repulsive. Did he swap his anti-depressants for roids? Will the next Dissociatives album transcend the only echelon of sonic scrotum they’re yet to conquer, and release some sort of Andrew WK-style album?

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When You’ve Come Out, You Need a New Secret Shame

January 31, 2005

…and my shame is obsessive-compulsive viewing of Deal or No Deal, on my eternal quest to finally understand the most confusing gameshow in the world. Where do I even begin to start? To the outside viewer, Deal shimmers as an innocent glittery gameshow, no different than the rest. How utterly mistaken you are. Perhaps you’ve [...]

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I Got my Daydo from Kayza-Ayza

January 27, 2005

When Adam and I resided in Melbourne last year, we truly understood the value of great neighbours. Up until then, we’d had a great run of near-silent people living around us. In Melbourne, though, we were dragged down into the real world by an apartment full of nerds who worked from home – exclusively between [...]

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I’m such a grandpa

January 25, 2005

I’m going to need a grandpa nap between work and seeing System of a Down tonight, because I am ridiculously tired today. Truly, this will be my life at age 50 on most weekends. Naps, metal gigs where I’m the single obligatory 40+ saddo in a t-shirt from a band which last toured 15 years [...]

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The Science of Vomiting

January 23, 2005

Never let it be said that I’m not protected when I go out at night. Even when I was living in the depths of Redfern, as long as Adam was near me, I knew I’d be fine in the company of someone who knows…. well, I’ve lost count of how many martial arts. This is [...]

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AFLEVER!

January 23, 2005

Also, apparently I’m the only person in New South Wales counting down the days until the AFL pre-season cup. Goddamit, I’m really going through withdrawl – especially after moving back to a state that shuns Aussie Rules in leiu of some other stupid game, which involves big beefy fellas in tight shorts, running around trying [...]

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Something just dawned on me

January 19, 2005

Y’know what’s clobbered me over the head today, out of sheer surprise? Dawn Fraser has so far managed not to be wheeled out onto a major news program and jabber out her misguided opinions on a major sporting event (the Australian Open). My pickled memory assures me this is the first international-level pursuit of sport [...]

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Sunrage

January 18, 2005

I see that Latham resigned. That’s a shame. It would’ve been fairly symbolic, war-wise (even though he opposes Iraq), to eventually have our nation spearheaded by a man who gives off the impression of closing his eyes, counting to five, breathing deeply and silently mouthing mantras from his anger management classes before he can make [...]

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