A bloke in Melbourne, Australia who loves beer, dudes, metal music and falling over. RAD!

Last day at my current job, the uni. As predicted, I didn’t get a ‘surprise’ night out like most people do who leave our work. However, I was wrong when I predicted I’d get a cake – I didn’t. I did, however, get something a bit better. They gave me a big South Park framed poster, and on the back they’ve all signed and written little messages.

Today we had more job interviews for the person taking my position in the office, and we’re also conducting interviews for a new office manager at the moment. The first guy who came in looked like a mole, and became known as Mole Man. He was so rude, it was like everything he was doing was being videotaped to show people how to not apply for a job.

All one of the reception girls did was ask him ‘What was your name?’ and he yells “My name is not WAS, it is PHILLIP!!”. Then he started rambling about how this uni’s administration was really pissing him off. Ms Superiority stood up to him and really put him in his place. I’m going to miss her, I think. I hope there’s the equivalent of a Ms Superiority at my new job.

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One more day left at the uni I work at, then I’m outta there. As I mentioned yesterday, I’m still predicting that I get no surprise party like most people at our work do, just a crap card.

Actually, my boss took me aside today and said that he’d be prepared to give me quite a substantial pay rise if I agreed to stay. It was very tempting, but I’m really not enjoying working at this uni. I guess it was a question of morals. Usually I have no morals, but I centered on what I really want to do, which is this new job I’ve got, and gently turned his offer down. You know, I think I have no morals by default, because I’m gay. (Well, that’s what the media is telling me anyway, and they’re never wrong. So there).

It doesn’t even feel like I’m leaving. It’s a bit weird. Although I was allowed to sit in on the interviews of the people who are applying for my position at the uni. My favourite applicant was the woman who said she had a lot of experience in administration.

Ms Superiority (office bitch): So, have you had much experience in this field?
Job Applicant: Oh, yes. I administrated the change rooms at K-Mart. I had a lot of responsibility, I had to check how many clothes people were taking into the change rooms and give them the appropriate number of tags.

I reckon this woman redefined responsibility.

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I applied for a new job the other day – and I got it.

My current work, the uni, have been quite good about this. Ms Superiority who I have in the past viewed as 50% ally and 50% formidable bitch, showed her true side today when I told her what was happening with me. She actually admitted that this uni is ‘fucked’ and that yes, we do get paid a pittance. I didn’t mention I’m getting paid a fair bit less at this new job, but at least I’ll be enjoying it more. She’s rigged it so that I can finish with only 3 days notice rather than the 1 week required by law. Woo hoo.

I just realised today that I know 3 people named Zoran. Maybe I should consider changing my name to Zoran. It’s funny, because people always mis-hear the Zorans’ name, and most people call them Zorro by mistake. One of the Zorans I know makes full use of the fact that his name sounds like a superhero’s name, and answers his phone in the most ridiculous manner, like a cartoon superhero would. (Damn, these things are hard to put across in print).

Anyway. I bet my work doesn’t organise a cake, or a night out like for the last girl who left, and she was only here for 2 months. Wait and see, eh? I am betting you here and now I only get a crapola card, not even one with a joke on it.

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I don’t think I’ve really written much in my diary about Photocopying Man, who does all the photocopying for us, and not a hell of a lot else. I guess he does our banking and posts our mail for us too, but I never really see him do it. He’s sort of the well built up quiet guy who looks like he’d deck you if you looked at him the wrong way.

Fortunately for me, I’m good mates with Photocopying Man. Today I was telling him of my current frustrations with my current job and how I applied for a job yesterday (see yesterday’s entry.. duh).

Me: Honestly, sometimes I just come home and feel like shit. It can be so frustrating here.
Photocopying Man: Ya know what I do when I’m frustrated?
Me: No.. what?
Photocopying Man: I go out and pick up a hooker.

That’s literally everyday idle chitchat for Photocopying Man. It sure is good being on his side though. You see, I recently ordered a video from the US, and needed to get it converted into the Australian video format. I took it to a place that does video conversion (and at a hefty price too, $30, plus sales tax). Anyway, Photocopying Man offered to go and pick up my video and the new duplicate on his way to the post office. I said to him to make sure, no matter what, that he picked up two videos (meaning my original video, and the duplicate).

Anyway, 20 minutes later, he came up to my desk with a satisfied grin on his face. He matter of factly dumped a bag on my desk, and inside I found my original tape, and not one but two duplicates. I asked him if he knew why I had two instead of one, and he said “Well, you said to make sure I picked up two copies didn’t you? I just had to have a nice, friendly chat with them, if you know what I mean. They were trying to only give me one copy”. I don’t know what the hell he said, but Photocopying Man can be scarey when he wants to, and now I have an extra copy of the video as well. I should probably give it to Photocopying Man.

Things I Wish I Could Say To People Who Ring Up The Uni I Work At #581:

Me: Hello, how can I help you?
Caller: Hi, could I have the library please?
Me: Well, you know, we kind of need it.

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