Posts tagged as:

Advertising

Also, where does Mrs Muscle fit into this?

January 18, 2005

On TV just now: “Mr Muscle loves the jobs you hate.” Such as what? Returning DVDs to Blockbuster? Cunnilingus? Going to work? Actually, I probably could send a bottle of Mr Muscle to work in my place, and nobody would notice.

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This is why I am hesitant about working in online advertising again

February 1, 2003

Dumb ads like this:

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I Can Say No

September 9, 2001

Dear Snack Brands Australia, The packaging of your ‘CC’s Corn Chips’ continues to horrify me. In what can only be described as shades of communism, you continue to demand – nay, threaten! – consumption of your products or face an unknown sinister fate. Ominous threats such as ‘You can’t say NO!’ were perhaps, in communist [...]

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When General Waste Attacks

September 27, 2000

You don’t feel cold during chilly weather if you think about it properly. The key is – think of the weather as crisp, brisk or refreshing; rather than miserable or wet. This is what I was thinking right before the garbage bin hit my head. I was walking to the train station and a garbage [...]

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Hello, I have crabs. Hire me!

September 6, 2000

If I don’t get this job, I’m kinda screwed. I haven’t even been told that I have the job, but I’m walking around like I already do. Well… there WAS only one other person interviewed for the job, after all. Also, the guy at the recruitment agency said it’s looking ‘very, very positive’ for me. [...]

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The Myth of Wez

March 13, 2000

There’s nothing better than having arguments in chatrooms with people. The other night I was arguing with this strange character known as ScientologyBoy (age 18). Now, I’ve got nothing against (most) religions, as long as they don’t push their beliefs on me. I think religious beliefs are like genitals – you should only show them [...]

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Dynamic Crap Device

February 8, 2000

Yep, I’m back from Sydney. (Did you know on airplanes, when the oxygen masks drop down, that there’s a little oxygen mask that drops down in the toilet too? How cute is that? See, I do pay attention to the air stewards when they tell you all the safety procedures at the start of the [...]

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Furthermore, Twisties are now manufactured at Lost Dogs’ Homes

December 5, 1999

You thought it had ended with the laser lights in cinemas (see yesterday’s entry), but here is… Stupid Crimes To Be Imprisoned For #2: (Scene: Jail cell) Hardarse thug: If only I hadn’t have held up that jewellery store, I wouldn’t have been chucked in here for the next 10 years. Another hardarse thug: If [...]

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