Posts tagged as:

Internet

I’ll Be a Ghost

May 1, 2000

Yes, I’m sure Sega’s latest videogame console will follow the MINDBLOWING SUCCESS of all their previous consoles. Then again, even Nintendo has been known to have their hits and misses – does anyone remember the Virtual Boy? It was a shoulder-mounted headset that had rather shite black-and-white vision you squinted at through a set of [...]

1 comment Read the full post →

Benzophenone

April 29, 2000

For the first few days this week I was wondering where my pay was from my one day of temp work last week. I rang up my temp agency and they told me that the pay would be in later that afternoon, which it wasn’t. I checked again on Thursday and discovered I had double [...]

0 comments Read the full post →

Introducing: Boob Woman

April 17, 2000

(Sung to the chorus of ‘Poison’) Don’t you treat me bad! Don’t you make me sad! We only know how to sing this one song! We might make you mad, but we’re a flash in the pan! Just hold your breath, soon it will be over… BAH! They made it to number one. Who’s responsible [...]

0 comments Read the full post →

Your Opinion is Must Be in Demand!

December 15, 1999

How to cause anarchy, #582: Shopping centre public announcement system: Attention please. The alarms you are hearing are fire alarms. We are currently determining if there is a fire. Please stay alert and on standby for further instructions. Entire shopping centre full of highly-strung Christmas present shoppers: AIEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Yes, when I was in Bay City [...]

0 comments Read the full post →

Furthermore, Twisties are now manufactured at Lost Dogs’ Homes

December 5, 1999

You thought it had ended with the laser lights in cinemas (see yesterday’s entry), but here is… Stupid Crimes To Be Imprisoned For #2: (Scene: Jail cell) Hardarse thug: If only I hadn’t have held up that jewellery store, I wouldn’t have been chucked in here for the next 10 years. Another hardarse thug: If [...]

0 comments Read the full post →

The New Wave of Icy Pole Flavours

December 1, 1999

Wouldn’t you know it, right in the middle of this hot weather, our fridge starts playing up. Everything has gone frozen in the fridge, and let me tell you, there’s nothing quite like the novelty of frozen processed cheese. I’m still an eensy bit sick still, I’m mainly just running a temperature. I went to [...]

0 comments Read the full post →

Introducing Cottee’s Bourbon Cordial

August 8, 1999

My work (a uni) recently introduced a 1800 freecall phone number for general inquiries. This has lead to absolute mayhem with students abusing it and making prank calls. Since they found out about this phone number I’ve had a ton of those stupid “I. P. Daily” type names given for messages, but I think the [...]

0 comments Read the full post →

Where’s the Cheese?

July 26, 1999

Having three hours of sleep is great fun. You do really dumb things like stumble outside to your car in the morning in a half-asleep stupor to drive to the train station, not realising your windscreen is completely covered in ice until you’ve driven halfway down the street. There’s a certain chat site I use [...]

0 comments Read the full post →
Page 2 of 212